Dreams Come True

On November 17th, 2019, I was blessed enough to witness The Queen. Not the Queen of England, but the Queen herself, Lizzy Grant, or better known as Lana Del Rey.

It was actually quite the process. I have been obsessed with her since the 10th grade and have followed and listened to her discography since. However, throughout the years of being a young high schooler and broke college student, going to a concert of hers was out of the question. HOWEVER, now as a working girl, I could go!

The hype of the release of her album, the best one yet in my opinion, Norman Fucking Rockwell, I was waiting and waiting for the release playing LFL on repeat until the day the album released. Shockingly enough, when Lana announced her tour dates, she was only going to the west coast, which broke my sad girl heart.

However, near the end of the first leg of her tour, she announced a second leg--one where she would sing to the Midwest where I read "OKC" in small print and OF COURSE I HAD TO GO. Tickets didn't go on sale until October 11th at 10am in which I would be at work. At that moment, I booked a hotel not knowing whether or not I would get a ticket.

As soon as I got to work that day, early at 7:45am, I went and waited on the website and watched until the clock ticked to 9:59am, I kid you not, I literally watched the clock. Luckily, I wasn't with any students so I wasn't disturbed. As soon as it was 10, I purchased the tickets and it took a total of 3 minutes to get them. I bought two since I was paying for my sisters tickets and myself separate. I went off to reload the site to buy my ticket, AND I WAS IN LINE BEHIND 2000 PEOPLE. It was only 10:04am and then the tickets were sold out. Sad day because we were one ticket short and my younger sister couldn't go anymore.

Tickets were general admission ($49, I think) and VIP ($175, I think) and people were reselling them for twice as much! It was insane that I even got tickets.

Fast forward to the day of, I ventured off to Oklahoma City and people were already camped out. Now, I wanted to stand in line at 3pm, but my sister didn't want to go until AN HOUR before the show. I don't think so. We went about two hours before the show and we were still about a block down from the venue, so it wasn't too bad. Doors didn't open for anyone until 7:30pm and we got in about 7:45ish and waited for the opener which was Robert Ellis aka The Texan Piano Man, who had a wonderful voice and skill on both guitar and piano, yet terrible a terrible craft at song writing.

Lana didn't go on until nearly 9:15 where I nearly lost my shit. I feel like I've only been to shows where it is such a big arena and I end up watching the screen the entire night instead of the actual person, so seeing her didn't even feel real.

She opened with Norman Fucking Rockwell. And she sounded even better live, contrary to popular belief.

I am trying to upload all of my videos on youtube. 

I am a little bit sad that she only played a couple of songs from NFR. She did a lot of her oldies, a ton from the UV era and BTD, which I love, but NFR is by far my favorite out of all of them (it's hard to put the albums on a scale). Ugh, but it was the most perfect night, ever.

Updates on post-grad life...

I got an email the other day stating that I need to start making payments to my school loans...joy. Too bad, what they don't know is that I am going back to school.

Maybe if you are a believer in the fates and destiny or God--perhaps all of the stars aligned for once in my life. I was accepted into the graduate school that I applied to, my first choice. I applied truly on a whim in the middle of the night during an existential crisis that was keeping me up. I would like to believe I got in with my own merit though, give me a little bit of credit. Grad schools are tough to get into. 

The very same night that I found out I got in, I applied for housing. The school I applied for has housing for graduate students, so I sent in my application for a two-bedroom apartment that is on the edge of campus. I must say, I enjoy living on campus as nerdy or dorky as that sounds. I lived on campus all four years of undergrad, and I enjoyed it. I think I am just a nerd and I like the academic atmosphere that it provides. Plus, living on campus provides easier access for all things especially when your college is in a small atypical college town. The campus for grad school has more of a suburban setting and I am so freaking excited--there is a Target around the corner. No more going all the way to Little Rock for decent shopping centers. 

Speaking of Little Rock and Arkansas in general, I suppose I could have applied to grad school where I received my undergrad, but I decided against it. For one, I like change and I feel like I am in constant need of it. As much as I loved Arkansas, I wanted something different and a little more urbanized. Second, it's a little closer to home. When I was applying for undergrad schools, I was looked at schools at least 300 miles away from home. Far, but close enough. This time school is only an hour and thirty minutes away compared to three hours away. 

I am both excited and terrified at my decision for the impending stress that awaits me for the next two years of my life, but I feel like it is the most logical and correct step for me to take as I have no idea what else to do. So, in January, prepare to hear me complain!

Today, I did look at the graduate course catalog... and oh my god, there are so many classes to choose from. I want to take them all. I think I keep forgetting that I my program isn't under the English department, but the humanities department, which is its own entity. I've narrowed down my class choices to:

• Rome: Scandals and Saints (required class for curriculum)
• Advanced Film Criticism (not sure what the content is, but this class is required for curriculum.)

But now I am trying to decide between an elective... History of the English Language or Chaucer, both of which sound equally amazing. However, I did take Chaucer as an undergrad course, I would like to take it again as a graduate course, but I am not sure if I want to put myself through the torture again, even though I love the Canterbury Tales. UGH. Decisions, nerdy decisions. 

On more important life events in my post grad life...

• I finally purchased my dream car. 
• Work is in full swing, as the semester is in full swing. I have very busy days helping a range or smart and clueless college students
• Today, I am going back to work at another job, just to make some extra cash to save for school

The idea of continuing my education is such a daunting decision and I am scared for my life. However, it feels like the most realistic, natural, and right choice for myself right now. 

Finally getting my shit together...

Amidst all of the chaos in my life, I have finally landed a job. It's been about a month since my post that complained about the world being unfair, entry-level jobs, and me being annoying. But it seems that I am finally getting my shit together, or at least somewhat together.

I am officially a Writing Specialist at a local community college, which is the official title, but I am honestly just a glorified tutor for college-level education. I really truly must love living my life in semesters. This is my third week on the job and so far, I love it. What I do is help college kids write their essays. They make an appointment with me or whoever is here, and I help them with the writing process. I also am in charge of holding orientations and workshops on specialized topics--which is exciting. I must say, this is the first job that I have that I actually love and enjoy working at. To me, it's so fulfilling. During my undergrad, being an English major, I was--or rather still am the resident go-to for the "help me edit my paper!" or "can you fix it?" I gladly accepted these tasks from my friends because writing papers are my forte... yet I still struggle with my own writing. How funny, I love and help people write their paper's with no issue, but I feel an ever-growing sense of doom headed my way when I must write my own papers.

September was the busiest and most intense month by far this year. There is so much going on in my personal life and family and work. However, I've pushed through! It's October (already)! Needless to say, I think I love working in academia. Everyone around you is so smart, it makes you want to be just as smart. I'm just glad I am not faces the stressors of college this semester ;)

How to be a Beis-ic Betch

Summer is over which means my summer traveling is over. I feel like I owe this brand a review since I've been talking about it non-stop. Over the summer, I was lucky enough to travel pretty much all summer. The FBI agent watching me through my camera on my cellphone knew this and thus sent me numerous ads about travel gear. Naturally, I came across Shay Mitchell's new travel line since she was coming out with her summer line--and the stars all aligned. I was searching for a plain black weekender type of bag and she had one! Initially, I was hesitant in buying this bag because it was a little pricey for me, luckily I bought it when I did since the price is steadily increasing as the brand is gaining more popularity,                                                                                             I did decide on buying the Dopp Kitt and the Cosmetic case as I was also looking for a new toiletry bag and makeup bag. Something about the aesthetic drew me to this brand. For one, the products are plain but also still stylish and they are functional. Having matching luggage makes someone look a little more put together. When I see someone at the airport who has all matching everything, it makes me a little jealous of them because they look so put together. Unlike me, in recent years who just uses whatever bag suits me at the moment. One thing that annoyed me about the bag was that it came with a missing foot (the little thing on the bottom) so I had to email them. Beis customer service offered to send me a replacement, but I opted out and they sent me a partial refund since I wanted to use the bag ASAP on my weekend trip to Denver. 

This is the youtube video I watched that sold me on the bag. 

The Weekender. I opted for black over the nude colors because I am a mess, therefore I make a mess, constantly. I read reviews online about how big the weekender is and blah, blah, blah. Yes, it is big. The thing is bulky and huge. 9/10 times, you will have to use this as your carry on while flying--and let me tell you something... don't. I brought my weekender to London with me this summer. I flew from Tulsa to Dallas to Little Rock (to meet with my group) then from Little Rock to Dallas to London and then dragged my luggage and weekender from Heathrow to the train station to Paddington station, to the tube to get to Baker Street, down the block, through Regents Park to the university--and let me tell you something, not fun. 

While the bag is functional and cute and roomy--the bag is a bitch to carry. The bag can fit so much stuff, but when packing, I needed to be wary because the bag gets heavy quickly. The straps are uncomfortable and left bruises on my shoulders when I had to carry it by hand through the airport connections. My only saving grace was the trolley sleeve so that when I was walking in pure sweat through the streets of London I could rest the bag on my case. Aside from the trolley sleeve, the shoe compartment on the bottom is nice, too. It's saved me a couple of pounds by placing my shoes in there rather than my case since it weighed 48 pounds when I checked it in at the counter. The only thing that annoyed me about the shoe compartment was that if the compartment wasn't full, the bag is going to sink in, which makes it look frumpy. I should have kept the cardboard that came with it so that it would also sit-up. 

When I came back from London (flying from LR to Dallas since my ticket was from London to LR since I went with school, and then flying back home) I gate checked my weekender so I didn't have to worry about carrying it through DFW when I had to run to my connection. From now on, I think I will only use the weekender as an actual weekend bag when staying somewhere in town, going to a friend's or just a weekend trip. Never will this bag of mine see another airport again. 

But really truly, I love the bag. The bag fits my aesthetic and it is functional when I use it the right way. I think it is just trial and error to see if it works for you. I think these are just my complaints about when I took the bag abroad, other than that, it's an awesome bag. 

The Cosmetic Case. The cosmetic case is a game-changer. I've been looking for a makeup bag that has a handle and that can also fit my makeup brushed. It is an added plus that a mirror is included. What I love about it is the magnetic brush holder. It can easily pop in and out, so there is no constant flipping to get into your makeup bag.  I also love the full-size mirror that the bag comes with so when I'm traveling I don't have to use a little compact mirror or rely on the bad bathroom lighting. I think the idea and execution of this makeup bag are great--I've gone through so many makeup bags because I am so particular. AND it fits so much! 

The only thing I didn't like was that it loses its shape when it is squished in your luggage or bag. I put the case in my weekender while in the airport and the case squished and left creases, but maybe that's because it wasn't filled all the way and it was rather empty. 

The Dopp Kit. The days of using plastic bags as a toiletry bag are over!  I never knew there was an actual term for this bag--it's called a Dopp kit. This bag also has a compartment underneath the bag which comes in handy. I think I just have too many skincare products so it doesn't quite fit everything for me. I do like the concept of the bag, it's similar to the weekender with the wireframe so it opens up all the way. 

The Backpack. I haven't used the backpack yet, but I bought it anyway because I wanted my things to match. I wanted to find an alternative to the weekender for the airport and the backpack also comes with a trolley sleeve. A big plus for me was that the backpack can be used as a personal item and not a carry-on like the weekender. Now I can use my hand-luggage and my backpack together.                                                                                                                                             The backpack looks rather simple. It doesn't have all the crazy zippers and compartments that the backpacks I usually use, which is nice. It has a front pouch, a main pouch and a laptop sleeve with padding. I'm going through this thing where I am only into boring and simplistic things, as I have been told. So while I can't say what I love and hate while using the bag, I am excited to use the bag in the future whether it is for traveling or for school. 

So, that's it. That is my review of my Beis products. I am lucky enough to have bought them pretty early on when they were affordable (to my standards). Every time I go back and check the website, the prices are creepily going up. I think the prices have gone up at least by $20 from the prices that I bought my bags. In general, I think it takes a lot to invest in things like this. I think it's considered a luxury item to have and I question why I am spending my money on these products. But I thought about it and I am spending my money on where I am spending my time. I'm using the items regularly (as of now) so when you break down the cost, it's worth the cost. 

In conclusion, I recommend Beis for people who are looking to invest in new luggage. I think that Shay Mitchell has put a lot of effort into the functionality of these products and they have paid off. 

On a side note: Shay Mitchell liked my Instagram posts when I posted about using the weekender, which is exciting to me, lol. Shay Mitchell, if you're reading this, sponsor me ;-)

Is "Entry-Level" Even Entry-Level Anymore?

Job Search Depression... it's real. I didn't believe it, but it is. 3 weeks on the job hunt and I've come up with nothing (except an offer for Disney English that I declined due to me not wanting to move across the world at the moment).

A delusional me has applied to jobs in NYC, Los Angeles, San Francisco, and Dallas--and have yet to receive a word from any type of job that I would actually want. I have become so desperate that I even applied for a live-in nanny position on the Upper East Side, which in retrospect, is highly-unlikely. 

I have done all the things that society has told me to do thus far. Graduate high school, get into college, go to college, get some sort of internship, and graduate college. A person cannot help but think they're not good enough in comparison to the other millions of applicants fighting for the same job you are fighting for. I've come to the conclusion that entry-level positions are no longer entry-level positions. This is obvious of course. All the jobs that I want to apply or have applied for either require or prefer a master's degree. Welp, I'm only here with my puny bachelor's degree. 

So, I've done the unthinkable... I've applied to graduate school. The last thing I think I would do considering I declined my parent's idea of me going to law school. I just submitted my application and my non-refundable application fee about five minutes ago and I've just submitted my transcript. I feel odd writing about these things because I write them into existence and I am terrified of what it will do.

A random statistic I read once said that your resume is pulled out once for every 30 job applications. That’s a 1 in 30 chance. The future sounds pretty fucking bleak if that’s the case. 

So, I applied to 41 jobs on Indeed.com—the most random jobs. Some jobs were jobs that I wanted like editorial assistant positions in NYC and SanFran and the others were cold calling “entry-level” jobs. I can’t even tell you how many more jobs I actually applied to when going through a company website. Let’s just round up the number to 60 to make things easier. 

Out of said 60 jobs, I got calls for an interview from 5 companies. Two teaching abroad jobs in China and Korea, a random sales company in Massachusetts, a special education aide in San Francisco and a writing specialist for a local community college. I did a video interview with one of the teaching abroad jobs, but I don’t think that teaching abroad is right for me. I don’t think I’m brave enough to move to a foreign country and commit for a year. The idea of it sounds lovely—the travel and life experiences it can give you, but when I was actually offered it, the actuality of it was daunting in which I declined. The second job I had an interview with was the community college as a writing specialist. 

My limitations I have faced in the job search so far have led me to question my choice in my undergraduate degree. Who the heck majors in English? While in my undergrad I was posed with all of the questions “what can you do with an English degree?” “Do you want to teach” Blah. Blah. Blah. The truth is, one can do plenty of things with a degree in English, but at the same time, be so limited. Job search depression is real. It is a constant slap in the face of rejection, which hurts. You can’t get a job without experience, you can’t get experience without a job—in other words, you can’t win. 

But don’t pity me! I still have hope, a small silver lining that is. Maybe I have to go back to school to be more marketable with a master's degree. Although, I’m not sure how much more marketable I’ll be with a master's in the program I applied for. Maybe I’ll write a book with the many ideas that skid across my brain and turn myself into a novelist. Or maybe and the most likely of these options, maybe I will become a full-time stay at home daughter. 

I Want to be a Londoner--my summer study abroad trip

If you follow me on Instagram, you know that I went to London this past summer since I posted about it almost every waking hour, I apologize for that. I also mentioned in a post in February that I was going, but never followed up on it. I feel like I owe my trip a worthy blog post as I posted about it non-stop and received numerous questions regarding my trip. As basic as this sounds, participating in a study abroad is life-changing as is traveling abroad in general. I now fully understand why all of the sorority girls I rolled my eyes at who claimed this experience as life-changing feel. I was lucky enough to have this study abroad as my last college credit to graduate and even luckier that the program was called "Literary London" which was right up my alley as English was my major.

The program being called Literary London focused on the literature that was written in London and surrounding areas. The study abroad program was short, but we luckily got to have two excursion days to Stratford-upon-Avon (Shakespeare's birthplace) and to Canterbury, which were probably the most exciting places to visit as Shakespeare and Chaucer are so well-known. For me, this trip was like a course wrap up in my undergraduate career. All of the things that I have been reading about for the past four years, I got to see and witness the environment in which it was written and inspired by.

To answer some questions I was asked... The small group of us stayed at Regent's University London which is located right in Regent's Park across from Queen Mary's Rose Garden. Imagine the smell of roses every single time you arrived and left school. While we were students at the university, we were not locked up in a small classroom all day the way that I have heard other programs work. This trip was more of an independent study. We met up in the morning and then took the tube to wherever our destination was that day. We were assigned readings and then went to corresponding places and museums to see artifacts.

London is so rich in history and if you don't know your British history, you can literally walk past in on the streets never knowing. I visited London through a literary lens. As fun as it was to see the iconic things in London like the London Eye, Big Ben, Tower Bridge--it's even better when you've read the literature that was written and inspired by the city--at least for the literary nerds that is me, anyways.

It's hard to choose what my favorite thing I saw or did in London was, but if I had to pick only three, I guess I would say... Tower Hill, Chaucer's tomb, and the Canterbury Cathedral.

The Tower of London. To think, Anne Boleyn walked the very same paths that I walked here and climbed the very same towers. 

Tower Bridge from Tower Hill. 

Tower of London in comparison to the new modern buildings. I love the temporality in this picture. which one doesn't belong?

Chaucer's tomb. The first poet buried in Poet's Corner. Coming here is like an Homage since I've spent too many semesters reading Chaucer and writing about the Canterbury Tales endlessly.

The Canterbury Cathedral--where so many pilgrimages were made in which I feel like I made one myself 

I suppose I could very well go into the details of every single day I was there since I was required to keep a travel journal. Instead of posting a day-by-day entry, I will post the essay that I had to write at the end of my program. I feel like the essay is much more insightful than if I go into details of every day of my trip. So if anyone cares, below is a textbox with my reflection paper that is more self-actualizing and pretentious than I imagined.

I have already experienced my moment of realization of exactly how big this world is and my impending insignificance to it. I did not anticipate crossing the pond and exploring London to have such a huge impact on me, but it did, and I am glad because it gave me a new sense of self. I’ve explored big cities before; I grew up in Fort Worth and I’ve traveled to the big American tourist cities. These cities, however, never gave me a new sense of wonder and realizations about myself. They simply felt like another place. I never understood how people could fall in love with cities and talk about them endlessly until I came to London. I now fully understand why London is so literary. There is so much to be inspired by. Being in London gave me a new sense of freedom and independence that I did not know that I could ever need or feel.

 One of my favorite days was the day we spent in Hampstead Heath. The day felt like a proper London day with the weather being gloomy and by us exploring a cemetery. I can understand why a number of writers lived in Hampstead. I love the area. While Hampstead is still in London, being there did not feel the same as being in the City of London. Maybe it was the change of weather or maybe it was the trees and I felt like it was more peaceful in comparison to the hustle and bustle in the city. I loved being in Hampstead and being in the place where Keats wrote “Ode to a Nightingale” which is my favorite ode by him. Being and seeing the environment of where literature is written provides such a different impact to the context when reading it in comparison to sitting in a classroom where London feels so far away. To me, I almost feel a part of the literature or feel as if I can understand it more.

 I also loved being in Highgate Cemetery. Normally, I find cemeteries to be creepy and haunted, but this cemetery did not feel this way. Highgate Cemetery felt so untouched and peaceful instead of the spooky feeling that I was anticipating. I’m not sure what it is with seeing literary figure’s graves, but they feel almost like a pilgrimage. I love “Goblin Market” by Christina Rossetti in how it seems like a children’s story, when it is in fact not. I love the complexity in the symbolism and the interpretations that come along with it. To me, when I find these artist’s graves, it feels like a homage to them. I felt this way with not only Rossetti’s tomb, but Chaucer and Shakespeare’s as well. The Hampstead day was not only one of my favorites because of the Keats House and Highgate Cemetery, but it was also the day I got lost with a dead phone in which I found my new sense of independence and freedom all while feeling lost. After we ended collectively as a group, I headed toward Notting Hill.

In order to get there, I needed to: take the Northern line southbound, take 4 stops to Euston, switch platforms on the same line to King’s Cross, transfer to the Circle line train westbound to get to Westbourne Park. Embarrassingly enough, I found myself lost and walking in circles at Euston’s tube stop as I was searching for the correct platform. I was at the point where I was getting on the wrong tube and actually going back and forth between Camden Town and Euston. Even though I never felt so lost in my life—at least location-wise, I surprised myself by not having an ounce of fear in me. This feeling of being lost and figuring out where I needed to go without anyone’s help was actually endearing more than it was terrifying. I almost gave up and headed back toward the Baker Street tube stop, where things were familiar. Instead, this thought of, “Oh, you can figure out where to go by yourself in a large city” went through my head and gave me an empowering feeling of being alone. Knowing that my phone was going to die, I transcribed everything that my Maps was telling me to go and drew a quick sketch of the area of where I was going in my notebook.

 Luckily, I found my way to Notting Hill all in one piece. I explored Portobello Road and looked at all the street markets, found the travel book shop and the blue door from the movie Notting Hill all before my phone died! By the time I made it to the Notting Hill Gate tube station to Kensington, my phone was dead, but if anything, it made the journey all the more interesting having to figure things out as I go. I think I enjoyed exploring without any technology. I feel like it allowed me to take in more of London, instead of capturing and remembering everything through my phone’s camera. Without relying on technology for directions or as a camera, navigating my way through the streets of London felt more satisfying. As much as I love seeing London with the group, I love seeing and experiencing London by myself. When I am with the group, I feel like such a tourist depending on Dr. Taylor and Dr. Sharpe for directions. When I am actually by myself, I feel like I am exploring London as I have to figure out everything by myself.

 This class, Literary London, is my last class before graduating. By this being my last class, it feels like my undergraduate studies have come full circle. I have read all of this literature in the classrooms of Witherspoon at Arkansas Tech, but never in my dreams did I ever think I would actually get to see London with my very own eyes. London just felt like such a faraway place. Now having been to London, I feel like I can understand the literature written there even more by having seen and experiencing the city. Being back home has been strange for me. Even though I was only in London for a short time, I feel like I have gotten too used to the hustle and bustle of the city. I miss the noises of the city and the crowds of people. I don’t think I will ever be the same again. I have had many life experiences that I would have thought would change me or my outlook on life, but London truly did change me in a good way. I have gained this new sense of freedom and independence that I never knew could exist and that I didn’t know I could need. I feel as if I left a piece of my mortal soul in London and I must go back to retrieve it if I am ever to be whole again.

I think I wrote more than I anticipated, but oh well. This trip was amazing, so I owe it some justice.

Navigating Through Post-Grad Life...

I've been MIA since... all of my senior year of college actually, but that's okay! My absence is for a good cause.

I am happy to announce that after all of the pain, suffering, and crying... it has been paid off...at least in the form of credentials. I am happy to say that as of August 10th, 2019, I am officially a college graduate with a degree in English Literature. While I didn't go to my actual graduation to walk (I didn't need to walk to feel the sense of validation), I did finally get my diploma mailed to me.

While these credentials are supposed to open the doors to endless possibilities, I can't help but feel as if my life is in a freefall into the abyss. Instead of doors being opened, I feel as if they are all being slammed in my face.

Fear not! While these doors are being slammed in my face, I will try to consistently post about navigating life after college on this blog.

 Disclaimer: This blog was created when I was 16 years old. I feel as if we should discard and consider everything before this post obsolete in regard to my knowledge and writing skills. I also tried to revamp the look of this pitiful blog, so through all of my coding and rearranging, pictures have been lost--I'm not sure if it helps this blog or not. The latter, most likely. I must keep this blog current! If I am ever to get a job in the field I want, I must! I must write and expose myself to the millions on the internet and the bots who actually come across my tiny spot on the internet.

So, I will now set this blog as public for the masses to read my thoughts instead of keeping this blog private for only a select few friends to read. Here we go...
-

My attempt as a Youtuber

Here is my sad attempt at being a Youtuber and vlogging in which I fail at. I would much rather be behind the camera than in front of the camera--or in this case writing behind my laptop screen.

This trip was last minute and on a whim. Ten hours in a car. 5,000 feet about my normal elevation and then another 5,000 once up in the Rockies.

On a more important note, I will be in London in a mere matter of days! This is my last class before I graduate in August (in which I will not be in attendance for graduation). Since my professors bought the airline tickets, they bought tickets that depart from Little Rock. As I don't live in Little Rock, I will have to fly from Tulsa to DFW to Little Rock a day early. So I turned into an adult for a second to book my hotel room and check my flights (luckily, I can fly standby thanks to my dad). In a few short days, I will go and win back Prince Harry!

Cheerio!

The Most Annoying Type of Bloggers..

The most annoying type of bloggers, I feel like that is a misleading title. I suppose I should call it "The most annoying thing a blogger can do."

I write on the internet to express my feelings, in ways, it's my online diary that I allow people to read--whether people may read or not. (However, after skimming through old posts, this blog seems to be a chronicle of my complaints about college.) In no way is this small space on the internet an ode to myself where I list my achievements on an endless list like others do. I write my truth and understandings of how the world works and people may agree or disagree, or even learn from them. This blog chronicles my fortunes and misgivings. 

This is truly just a rant, so feel free to exit anytime. People can do whatever they want, but these are just the things that annoy me, lol. 

1. I think there are a handful of bloggers who know that to be marketable in the blogging world is to be relatable. I feel like that is how Youtubers gain millions of subscribers and that is by being relatable. These handfuls of bloggers that I come across try so hard to be relatable in order to gain success. I feel like this works, obviously. People read blogs because they are interested in what a blogger is doing or because they are relatable. But it also doesn't work as it can come across as being pretentious when every single post comes across as trying to be relatable. It's almost like a big neon light flashing "Look at me! I'm relatable!" Perhaps this is just me that feels this way. Maybe people are into this, maybe not. I mean, of course, experiences should be shared in order to start a conversation. However, there is a certain point where I think enough is enough, but this is just my thoughts about it.

 2. Bloggers who pass off their opinions as the god-given truth. How ironic is this post? People post their do's and don't as rules to follow in life. I think these can be helpful tools, but not when they are spout out as orders.

Maybe I'm crazy and I just think about these things. 

A Londoner for one month only--coming this summer!

Hi, fiends! Nope, that’s not a typo, I’m addressing you all as fiends in this post. (Omg the show Making Fiends was so amusing to me in the 5th grade.) Warning, this post is about me needing out over literature, so if you don’t care, feel free to stop reading.

Anyways! As my friends know me, I am always talking about the two men in my life… yes, two! That being Chaucer and Shakespeare. For some reason, a lot of my coursework has been about these two fine fellas and their works in which I have grown a great admiration in Chaucer’s Canterbury Tales and Middle English literature in general and Shakespeare’s plays and sonnets. Anyways, again, I’m always annoying and I make references to them in normal conversations that only my English major friends will understand, everyone else is mildly annoyed.

As I said sometime before, I’m going to England this summer for a study abroad in which I will be studying English Literature (English lit and American lit, two different things, my friends) and it focuses on going to the places that great pieces were written. NERDING OUT HERE since I get to go to Charles Dickens Museum, Keats House (ahh!), Sherlock Holmes Museum (Arthur Conan Doyle, ahh!!!!), Samuel Johnson’s House (even bigger AHHHH!), the globe theatre (ahhh) and there’s so much more, I can’t even name them all.

Those places are exclusive to London and surrounded areas. But even better news, I get to go to Canterbury for a day and to the medieval village where Shakespeare was born, Stratford-upon-Avon—in case you didn’t know.

Literary nerds rejoice for me because if I can get over the fact I can’t to see where actual great, wonderful literature was created, fuck me! I mean aside from that, I am going to be able to see a lot of culturally cool things and landmarks and places. And as some of you may know, I watch too much Brit television shows just to listen to their accents—for linguistic regional purposes.

I’m excited, I don’t mean to brag but it’s fun and awesome since I get to end my college education on this. And I promise to come home to America with a bad, fake accent if I’m not bribing my ex, Prince Harry, home. If you don’t hear from me, it’s because I’m snogging some (hopefully rich and a duke) British man!

2019... senior year.. ch-ch-changes

Wow! It's been a minute! I've been so busy due to the fact that I am a terrible blogger, also because it is my senior year of college, so who can blame me? Also, no one is even reading this anyway, so the only person who minds is me.

First... Let's see.. last I wrote, it was September and I just got home from a wedding. Since then, I've been busy away reading and writing trying to make the best out of my senior year of college.

Second, exciting news! I am going to London this summer! I have to finish the spring semester, take two summer classes, and then the study abroad, and then I am done! Done, done, and done with my undergraduate career! I'm going to nerd out over literary places and fangirl over movies that took place in London and of course, attempt and fail to win over the now married Prince Harry.

Life has its highs and lows, and I've experienced many in the time between where I haven't been writing and even while I have been writing, but life gets busy and I just honestly forget to write, but here is always hoping for change!